Emerging from an idea
back into the war
back into a world of fear
that rotten place I left before
that forgotten place where spotlights
come at you from all angles
shining into every locked box and crack
that place where interactions tend to feel like an attack
where music’s played too loud and fast
with obstacles I can’t get past
where the reality of me eclipses the idea
where the ugly truth usurps the fantasy
laid bare for all the world to see.
It’s not the me I need to be.
There’s only one thing for it then;
disappear into ideas again.