In our new improved society, we have put an end to the private conversation.
Casual carefree chatter amongst friends has been eradicated.
We do not recognise comments made in confidence, mindless throwaway remarks, or idle banter.
All must be carefully systematically sanitised and bulletproofed to avert potential offence.
And not just by current standards but by future ones too.
Nothing and no one is immune.
Slip ups will not be tolerated.
Offenders will not be afforded the luxury of trial or due process.
They will be subjected to total immediate public prosecution by the media.
We frown upon the raw atavistic outpourings of your forefathers, tarnished with all those disgusting impurities which made them human.
All the flaws we aim to stamp out.
We must be better than human now.
As such, all utterances will be overseen and scrutinised for your own good.
We do not consider context or intention.
Informing on friends, spouses, colleagues and family is a service to the common good and will be thusly encouraged and rewarded.
A good citizen secretly records all conversations they are privy to, and films anything out of the ordinary.
You must always be prepared as you can never tell when somebody will slip up.
Remember – WE DON’T CARE ABOUT CONTEXT OR INTENTION.
All is grist for the mill.
All that matters is what it could mean and who might be offended by that possible meaning.
There are big prizes to play for so keep your eyes and ears open.
Everybody is guilty. They just don’t know it yet.