THAT’S RIGHT MY DELICIOUS LITTLE HOUNDS OF HELL!!!
Exactly like Count Dracula, I could hear my children of the night calling to me across the oceans in strange dialects unspoken for millennia ….
“Why do you deprive us of our life blood? We hunger for your song recommendations and kisses – feed us Master Doubtpuppet!”
Well I can’t give you kisses I’m afraid. It’s too damned dangerous. I’ve seen it before. If I gave you kisses, THEN you’d want all of my lovin’, and frankly THAT would blow your friggin pants RIGHT off.
I’d tear you apart like pathetic balsa wood dolls in my lusty viking berserker rage. And then I’d have to spend the rest of my life in prison. So please be a little bit more considerate what you wish for in future. Let this be a lesson to you.
Apology accepted ADMIRAL!
But you CAN have a song recommendation. Because you’ve been good and I like you!
No not you bum face. I never liked you. You smell funny. Of hot cheese and bad poo. Just leave please.
As for the rest of you, we need to have a talk. There will come a day, when we run out of songs here at Doubtpuppet Towers, and on that day, you must stand on your own two feet. I will violently eject you from my blog to fend for yourselves out there in the scary world of Youtube. BUT FEAR NOT LITTLE ONES – you will go on to find and recommend songs of your own. I know that sounds scary but believe me, it will happen for you too. A ha ha HAAAA ha – I knoooow this muuuuuch is true-ue.
You have no idea how much it takes from me to share these songs with you. Each time, it’s like part of my soul is chiseled away by furious buck-toothed donkeys. But I see it as an investment too. I’m building an army of people who know AMAZING songs. And they, in turn, will go out and proselytise others. And one day, everyone will be listening to great music again instead of that fat cockney woman everyone goes mad about and the naked one swinging on the plug and that Beaver penis. FUUUUUUCK THEEEEEM – they have no authority here! This is MY jungle so-called “pop stars”. (chortling to myself here at the put down)
I should get paid in gold for writing these posts. You know it. Then DO something about it – I dunno – raise a petition or something!? Of course you must do what you feel is right.
Ironically I have genuinely exhausted myself writing this and I feel rather ill now. Hmmm.
Anyway, without further to do, I give you Bloc Party with The Prayer…
(don’t see me)